I didn't read McEwan's article that way. It's primarily an enumeration of justifications for acceding to one particular anti-feminist cultural practice. She ends with an exaltation of "choice", as if a "choice" to follow patriarchal tradition were above criticism. It's also a great way of overrepresenting the (presumably) small number of women, in unusual circumstances, who can justify their choice, and for those who made the choice for ridiculous reasons ("I really like his family") to escape criticism by hiding behind that small number who made it for reasons of personal safety.

If her reasons 1 through 9 had any real currency, why isn't anyone going up to Quebec to lobby against their terrible law that doesn't let anyone change their name when they get married? (And it's not easy to change your name in Quebec by other means.) Has feminism failed in Quebec by denying women this choice?