azurelunatic: AO3 rating glyph: Explicit, Multi-relationships, choose not to warn, unfinished.  (AO3)
[personal profile] azurelunatic
Last night my shower head sprang the kind of leak at the places where it screws together that you really can't ignore. I turned it so the leak was at least going into the shower instead of the ceiling, and determined that I was fucking going to Home Depot and getting some teflon tape and a goddamn new shower head thingy.

After the doctor.

My sleep schedule has been fucked up lately, a little more than usual. But I managed to get enough sleep in two chunks so that when morning-ish hit, I was vaguely well-rested, if rather more inclined to get chatty about stuff on IM than usual.

I can recommend tunic-length loose tops for ultrasounds where you don't have to take your shirt off. They give you a modicum of body-modesty that doesn't involve juggling a drape.

Read more... )

The imaging techs don't get to discuss any of your results with you. That's for the doctors. So I was absent any more practical information about what was going on, but slightly less physically comfortable due to some of the joysticking about in my nethers.

I had changed back, left the department, and was nearly in the bathroom when my phone started ringing. It was an unfamiliar number, but also a 602 number, and so I answered it.

It was Dawn! I had kept trying to get in touch with her, but her phone kept going straight to voicemail, so I'd finally resorted to leaving a message on Facebook, where there were signs of life.

She had bad news. She'd intended to call me last night, but there had been a death in the family. I told her my twolocked biglocked items of news. And now I have her new number.

My phone has been chewing through battery unfortunately quickly lately, but I called [personal profile] norabombay anyway, and we chattered about things. Then I picked up a new showerhead and some teflon tape at Home Depot, and came home.

I'm having a bit of a hard time this week, and I don't think it's going to get much easier until sometime late next week, at which point it will be differently hard.

Purple and I discussed dinner, but he was kind of stressed (presentation, and he hates making slides) and tired, and I was just drained, so we called a pass. Tomorrow, maybe.

For the past couple days I'd not been using the bouncyball as my desk chair, and the lack of motion had been beginning to get to me. I've noticed that in part due to the bouncyball, stairs have been easier for me when I've had to encounter them! This is good, and I will continue to watch for improvements.

Purple continues to be a voice of reason to me on a good many issues, and I deeply appreciate it. He also refuses to serve as chaperone. "In my day you couldn't even talk while dating!"

I had an interesting conversation about preferences in smut with more than one friend, more or less simultaneously. The juxtaposition was amusing. Read more... )

After that entertaining conversation, it was just about time for bed, at which point I remembered that I needed to fix the shower.

Fortunately, unscrewing everything, applying new teflon tape, and screwing it back together proved to fix all of the things. I could wish for such an easy fix on many more. I guess I take the unneeded new shower head back to Home Depot in tomorrow's errands or something.

[Linkspam] Tuesday, July 26

Jul. 26th, 2016 08:10 pm
tim: A bright orange fish. (fish)
[personal profile] tim
On a technicality, by Eevee (2016-07-22). About the need for both rules and trusted leadership in communities.

Firing Roger Ailes and exiling Milo Yiannopoulos isn’t going to fix much of anything, by Sady Doyle for Quartz (2016-07-22). "The truth is that harassment and abuse are never about individual people; they’re about structures. When we help the victims of harassment, the solution should not be to deal with a single offender; it should be to deal with all the people who enabled the problem to exist and refused to solve it until it reached a critical mass."

Reddit is still in turmoil, by Kate Conger and Megan Rose Dickey for Techcrunch (2016-07-21). Reddit is a trash fire, as a business and not just as a community.

What Science Says To Do If Your Loved One Has An Opioid Addiction, by Maia Szalavitz for FiveThirtyEight (2016-07-19), and for a somewhat different take, a Tumblr post: "...drug addiction, across the board, actually has the best prognosis of any mental illness without any treatment whatsoever."

How about some mixed corgi puppies? The Australian shepherd and golden retriever mixes are my faves.

How ‘Political Correctness’ Went From Punch Line to Panic, by Amanda Hess for the New York Times Magazine (2016-07-19). "In [Trump's] campaign, 'P.C.' is no longer just a joke, or a slick rhetorical tool for riling the base. It’s the shrewd recognition of a dark aspect of white American psychology: That many experience being told not to use certain words as a kind of violence."

I’m With The Banned, by Laurie Penny (2016-07-21). On Internet trolls and "weaponized insincerity": "Milo is the best player here. Like Trump, and like a lot of successful politicians in this postmodern circus, they channel their own narcissism to give voice to the wordless, formless rage of the people neoliberalism left behind. They offer new win conditions for the humiliated masses. Welcome to the scream room. There’s a cheese plate."

Your pipeline problem is that you’re not doing anything to reach the pipeline., by Kieran Snyder (2016-07-21). "If you’re looking in the same places, sourcing and talking to candidates the same way year after year, and not getting the results you want, it doesn’t mean that there’s a pipeline problem. However, it does unequivocally mean that your particular approach has roundly failed at tapping into whatever pipeline exists."

The Coming War on ‘Black Nationalists’, by Yohuru Williams for The Nation (2016-07-20). Everything old is new again: "To be clear: The black lives movement unapologetically focuses on the dignity and worth of black lives. The careless and dishonest way Duffy, Giuliani, Clarke and others chose to frame that movement creates a context that shifts attention away from the very police practices that nonviolent protesters are demonstrating against. "

Republican Convention 2016 Attendees Are Searching for Hot Gay Sex on Craigslist, by Nicolas DiDomizio for mic.com (2016-07-19). Of course, eh?

OOCQOTD: Bernie Bronies

Jul. 26th, 2016 01:51 pm
emceeaich: A film title placard reading: "3. In all cases the beavers were aware of the camera." (beavers)
[personal profile] emceeaich

[M]aybe someday [B]ernie [S]anders and [L]auren [F]aust will bond over how they accumulated such insufferable fanbases — Anonymous, quoted with permission.

(no subject)

Jul. 26th, 2016 10:13 am
naath: (Default)
[personal profile] naath
Liv found a meme, it's been ages since I perpetrated this kind of meme...

meme )

almost missed Monday again!

Jul. 26th, 2016 12:42 am
synecdochic: torso of a man wearing jeans, hands bound with belt (Default)
[personal profile] synecdochic

Every week, let's celebrate ourselves, to start the week right. Tell me what you're proud of. Tell me what you accomplished last week, something -- at least one thing -- that you can turn around and point at and say: I did this. Me. It was tough, but I did it, and I did it well, and I am proud of it, and it makes me feel good to see what I accomplished. Could be anything -- something you made, something you did, something you got through. Just take a minute and celebrate yourself. Either here, or in your journal, but somewhere.

(And if you feel uncomfortable doing this in public, I've set this entry to screen any anonymous comments, so if you want privacy, comment anonymously and I won't unscreen it. Also: yes, by all means, cheer each other on when you see something you want to give props to!)

(no subject)

Jul. 25th, 2016 03:09 am
sasha_feather: Black, white, and red image of woman with futuristic helmet (Sci Fi Woman)
[personal profile] sasha_feather
Have headache, can't sleep.

Good things:

Going to the movies. I saw X Men Apocalypse at the cheap seats yesterday, and Star Trek Beyond today. Good way to escape the heat, and both were enjoyable films.

Pretty sunset tonight.

Cherries!
jesse_the_k: Ultra modern white fabric interlaced to create strong weave (interdependence)
[personal profile] jesse_the_k
[personal profile] recessional’s month-old discussion of the next steps in our deeply divided US election is still brilliant, and still true.

 

Along the way,

[personal profile] sholio made a great point about inside/outside voices, code-switching, and venting in the right way at the right time & place:

 

http://recessional.dreamwidth.org/1094424.html?thread=11603992#cmt11603992

Taste of wisdom ) Since I left the working world behind in 1993, I need reminding that spewing TMI at everyone I meet doesn't always work.
tim: "System Status: Degraded" (degraded)
[personal profile] tim
It's a popular thing to say that abortion is a complicated issue, or a moral gray area, or that there's room for lots of different opinions on it because it's so nuanced. It's popular in general to take this kind of mealymouthed non-position, because it makes you sound thoughtful without requiring any moral effort or stamina.

When it comes to reproductive rights, even liberals are likely to hesitate, to cite bioethics, or to say that abortion is a necessary evil. They're likely to say that it should be safe, legal and rare.

But here's the thing about abortion: the only way you could possibly have doubts as to whether everyone should have completely unfettered access to it is if you're either uncertain about bodily autonomy as a right everybody has, or if you're uncertain about whether it's something people other than cis men should have.

I don't think anyone is really uncertain about bodily autonomy. At least for cis men, we're generally in agreement that one of the rights that all human beings have is to not have any other person in their body without consent.

One of the times when we decide to suspend personhood is when somebody is imprisoned. The widespread acceptability of prison rape jokes shows that the one situation when we consider suspending bodily autonomy okay is when we think somebody deserves to be punished.

So there are really only two reasons for thinking abortion is a moral gray area:
  • You don't think women are really people.
  • You think women should be punished for having sex.

Of course, cis men don't get punished for having sex with other consenting adults, because having sex with other consenting adults is something that human adults get to do. So it comes down to whether or not you're sure women are really people.

(While the effect of forced pregnancy is that everyone with a uterus, including cis women and trans men like me, as well as genderqueer people who have uteruses, the intent behind the pro-forced-pregnancy movement is to control women and punish them for existing as sexual beings. We need to be aware of both effects and intent here.)

Are you sure that women are people? Then surely you believe that nobody has a right to be in a woman's body without her consent.

Do you think that having sex grants implicit consent to pregnancy? Then you don't really think women are people, because we're all fine with men having consensual sex and don't, as a rule, believe they waive any of their basic human rights by doing so. Thinking women waive their bodily autonomy by choosing to have sex really just amounts to treating pregnancy as a punishment for sex.

I'm assuming that people who have doubts about abortion believe that fetuses and embryos are people. If they don't think that, then I really don't know what they're on about (although there is plenty of evidence they don't really think that -- ask a pro-forced-pregnancy person whether they favor punishing somebody who has an abortion in the same way that people who commit murder are punished.) Believing that fetuses are people poses no threat to my believe in the fundamental right to an abortion. Like all people, fetuses have no right to be in any other person's body without that person's consent.[*]

And yet, in 2016, I still live in a country where people considered liberal, progressive, in favor of civil liberties, and so on can still say abortion is a moral gray area with a straight face. I still live in a country where even liberals, even people who support personal freedom, haven't made up their mind about whether women are people.

[*] In answer to the question, raised elsewhere, of what we say if we believe fetuses are people and recognize that they didn't consent to be in the body of their gestational parent: I'd say three things to that. First, the concept that you have the right to self-defense isn't too controversial. You can come up with plenty of reasons why an adult person who is posing a threat to you might not be a totally free agent, but ultimately, your right to defend your body against invasion by them is considered sacrosanct. Second, fetuses don't have the ability to defend themselves, and I'm happy to defer that particular what-if to the time when that changes. And third, being in a situation you didn't consent to doesn't generally confer the right to use somebody else's body -- for example, if you would die without a kidney transplant, and if you didn't consent to have kidney failure, that still doesn't give you the right to force someone to donate their kidney to you if they don't want to.
azurelunatic: a bunch of grapes on the vine (Default)
[personal profile] azurelunatic
Via [personal profile] highlander_ii: http://www.katewillaert.com/ljstats/ will work if you substitute "dreamwidth.org" for "livejournal.com", as DW keeps its stats in the same place. This tool grabs about 5000 comments at once, so if you have more than 5000 comments in your journal, you can do some quick math to see where you want to put your startid if you'd like to see the most recent rather than the people from the beginning of time.

Who comments the most on this journal? )
[personal profile] alexbayleaf

Originally published at Spinster's Bayley. You can comment here or there.

Here is a guide to the care and feeding of a sourdough starter, in the form of a downloadable booklet.  It contains most of the advice I’ve been sharing with people for the past few years, whenever I give them some of my starter.

This sourdough guide contains:

  • How to store your starter
  • How to feed your starter
  • An easy method to make a basic loaf of bread
  • Scheduling/timing for making bread in winter and summer
  • Tips for better sourdough bread
  • Adding flavour
  • Out of bread? Can’t wait two days for a loaf?
  • Health and wellbeing of your starter

Download the sourdough guide:

Like what you see here?  Subscribe to my Tinyletter newsletter for other recipes, tips, and thoughts on resilient living.

Some examples of my sourdough

Fresh baked sourdough bread
Pumpkin and rosemary sourdough bread
Baguette style loaf

No-knead style loaf baked in cast iron
Crostini with garden tomatoes and ricotta
Dough rising

A dryish starter
Sourdough veggie fritters
Sourdough pancakes with caramelised apple

Long rolls replace crackers in my house
Sourdough foccacia with leek and olives
Walnut and rosemary bread


Story Time: How Jesse Broke Her Ankle

Jul. 21st, 2016 02:56 pm
jesse_the_k: Sprinter with right AK prosthetic leg, shot from neck down (prosthetic sprint)
[personal profile] jesse_the_k
I looked for this story in my archive but this event preceded my online journaling. I like to think it's amusing, so ... accidental injury while disabled )

The moral

Twelve years later, my ankles are definitely different. The worst sequela relates to the plates and screws. They don’t give like bone and tendon, so the right foot & ankle always hurts first (especially in very cold weather). Athletes generally have another surgery to remove any hardware; at the time, I couldn’t see the point. If I had to do it again I would go for the second surgery.

Learn the names of effective pain relief and write it on your “important things for an emergency” card. Just when I thought I understood living with a disability, something changes and there’s more to know.

Words can’t convey how wonderful MyGuy is.

azurelunatic: Animated woman's gloved hand dripping with her own blood.  (bleeding)
[personal profile] azurelunatic
Oh, uterus.

So because of reasons (mostly involving PCOS and my desire to maybe #bloodcannon a little less), I've been thinking about an IUD for a while. And since a few of my friends and I have entered into a mutual support pact about embodiment issues, it was well time for me to schedule an appointment for that.

Having determined to do the thing, I was rather in mind of doing it promptly, and since there has not in fact been any reason to suspect I might be pregnant (owing to not having been around any unchaperoned sperm since 2004-ish), sooner was better than later.

Unfortunately, the online appointment booking thing was down at the time I tried to get an appointment, so I wound up calling in; because I called in, I got an appointment with some random person from the office, rather than the uterus inspector I'd painstakingly picked out from the list. (The painstaking process went like: are they in this office? Do they not go on about how much they like babies? Does something about their profile strike me as friendly to me and people like me? OK then.)

Since it had been a while since seeing a uterus inspector when not in a highly traumatized and upset state of mind, and the state of the sexual health care art continues to change, I came prepared with a short list of questions whose answers I actually rather thought might apply to my current life. (I also have come to the conclusion that while I have no particular wish to get surgery which is super optional, I want to carefully monitor the risk & pain tradeoffs between keeping the uterus in and having the fucker OUT OUT OUT OUT OUT, and remove it as soon as it tips, rather than attempting to keep it around much past its best-by date.)

Read more... )

That was about that. I collected my things and headed out, leaving promises to get the sex ed hat properly up on Ravelry someday. And I headed for home, a little disoriented and definitely feeling profuse bleeding, but not feeling kicked anywhere tender.

I came home to assorted encouragement on Twitter. Of particular note were the "uterus explosion" misreadings, and then a bit of sublime silliness with [twitter.com profile] atavistique.

[twitter.com profile] azurelunatic I think it will be time for tea when I get home.
[twitter.com profile] atavistique and indeed there will be time/ to murder and create/ before the taking of toast and tea
[twitter.com profile] azurelunatic Do I dare/ Disturb the uterus?
[twitter.com profile] atavistique I have lingered in the chambers of the womb/ by follicles wreathed with endometrium red and brown
[twitter.com profile] azurelunatic Till the speculum is lowered, in the gloom.

After the alluded-to pot of strong tea, I felt equal to dinner out with Purple, which was largely pleasant. I finally got to introduce him to the bread pudding, which was spectacular and my entire reason for bringing him. After dessert, I looked at my phone when Purple stepped away from the table, and found that I had received an emotionally jarring text. I showed Purple, and reached across the table to take his hand while I freaked out gently, and mourned the world in which certain terrible things had not yet happened. Eventually we repaired to the parking lot, to discuss the hardships of having been the kind of grownup who lost the rock-paper-scissors for presidency of the HOA board (this was the "bagsy not-it" game), pie that has tentacles, and the way he's *mostly* a well-behaved grown-up, but there are just moments when he has to fuck with people's brains. I have rather more of those moments, and mostly I let them off harmlessly, but every now and then there's something like the helldesk software, or ... other, less innocent forms of fuckery ... and I aim myself carefully before going off.

A good 12 hours on, and the bleeding's slowed to something more normal. And now, having written all this, I shall perhaps consider bed!

Nicely abstract

Jul. 20th, 2016 02:12 pm
redbird: closeup of me drinking tea (Default)
[personal profile] redbird
I turned in the copyediting job, and am now back to proofreading a math book. Here at the bottom of page 16, I find "By the axiom of choice, there exists a set B which consists of one element from each Aα."

Encircling Meme!

Jul. 19th, 2016 10:16 pm
azurelunatic: A castle with rockets and fire cannons with the DW D on it. (Castle Dreamwidth)
[personal profile] azurelunatic
After a long hiatus, one of my friends has returned to Dreamwidth, and I thought: what better an opportunity to throw an encirclement meme?

I think my circle are nifty people who might possibly get along with each other. Feel free to introduce yourselves in the comments, and get to know other potentially like-minded people!

My crowd includes a lot of people who are tech-ish, who are writer-y, and who love a bad good pun.

Recommended reading

Jul. 19th, 2016 03:45 pm
sasha_feather: Big book of Lesbian Horse stories book cover (lesbian horse stories)
[personal profile] sasha_feather
Essay:

Hunger Makes Me by Jess Zimmmerman.

Content note: discussion of disordered eating.

For a woman who has learned to make herself physically and emotionally small, to live literally and figuratively on scraps, admitting that you have an appetite is a source of cavernous fear. Women are often on a diet of the body, but we are always on a diet of the heart.

---
Comic (web and print)

O Human Star by Blue Dellaquanti

http://ohumanstar.com/

Robots, roboticists, queer and trans experience, relationships, wonderful art. I want the goddess print that is over Alistair's bed.

The Beauty of Sign Language

Jul. 19th, 2016 02:45 pm
jesse_the_k: drawings of white hand in ASL handshapes W T F (WTF)
[personal profile] jesse_the_k
That Deaf Guy is a newspaper-style comic strip that's been funny for five years. I found it today, and I grinned through every one. (No text descriptions, tragically.)

click through for image, my description follows here
http://www.thatdeafguy.com/?p=106

[Image description: At a restaurant, two women at a table look over at a booth where a child, father, and mother are signing. The child is signing "Yes," the father is signing, "You have to poop right now?" and the mother is signing, "This minute?" One of the woman at the table says "Isn't sign language beautiful?" Description ends]

[Linkspam] Monday, July 18

Jul. 18th, 2016 03:59 pm
tim: A bright orange fish. (fish)
[personal profile] tim
An open letter to the author of the "I'm a closeted trans woman and I'm not coming out" essay, by Katelyn Burns (2016-07-13). "How many times will a closeted trans person read your essay and convince themselves again that not transitioning is the correct move?"

Not your feminist dream girl, by Raquel Rosario Sanchez (2016-07-13). "Like men, women are multifaceted people who can simultaneously support terrible policies and empowering ones. They are political candidates whose personal and political lives may make us cringe at points and cry with emotion at others. Feminists have pushed for more strong, complex, imperfect female characters on TV and in film, in order to get away from the one-dimensional women we are usually presented with in media. In Hillary, we have an influential woman who is just that: she is not the easy-to-figure out stereotype we expect women to be."

Invisible Talent, by Kaya Thomas (2016-07-14). On the frustrations of being a Black female computer science major and being told by an industry desperate to pretend its cultural failure is a "pipeline problem" that you don't exist.

Evidence, by feministkilljoys (2016-07-12). "My proposition is simple: that the evidence we have of racism and sexism is deemed insufficient because of racism and sexism." Long, meaty article about the function of demands for evidence of racism and sexism.

"The Best Time I Pretended I Hadn’t Heard of Slavoj Žižek", by Rosa Lyster (2016-07-14):
My advice is intended only for special occasions. It is for when you have an itch to scratch, and that itch is called, “a puerile desire to get on other people’s nerves.” All you do is stonily deny any knowledge of a person or cultural touchstone that you should, by virtue of your other cultural reference points, be aware of. These will of course be different for everyone, but my favorites include:

Žižek, John Updike, MORRISSEY (only for experts), Radiohead, Twin Peaks, David Lynch in general, Banksy (only for streetfighters), Withnail and I, Bauhaus (movement), Bauhaus (band), Afrika Burn, the expression “garbage person,” A Clockwork Orange, Steampunk (this one is really good), Jack Kerouac, “Gilmore Girls,” Woody Allen, the expression “grammar nerd,” the expression “grammar Nazi,” cocktails, bongs, magical realism, millennials, Cards Against Humanity, trance parties, bunting, many comedians, William Gibson, burlesque, the Beats, The God Delusion, sloths, anarchism, Joy Division, CrossFit, “The Mighty Boosh,” and Fight Club.


A White Male Led Revolution Against American Inequality, You Say?, by D Frederick Sparks (2016-05-22). "This blind spot, not being able to see these things because they don’t have to, is why I find it highly unlikely that white male left progressives are going to be the ones who identify and anoint the messianic figure in American politics who will lead the revolution against inequality. And if I had to wager, I wouldn’t put my money on said messianic figure being a privileged white male from the Northeast. I’d put my money on a black woman from the south or a Latina from the Southwest, someone who on an ontological and inter-sectional level understands the various power paradigms that contribute to unfairness in this country and can competently speak to and address all of them, and not just get fixated on one."

Dissociation is scary. Dissociation is safety, by Sarah Gailey for the Boston Globe (2016-05-08). CW: firsthand discussion of having PTSD and being triggered. This article describes what it's like for one person to have PTSD -- it's only somewhat close to my own experience, and if it isn't like this for you then you shouldn't assume it means you don't have PTSD, but more stories are always useful.

Martin Luther King’s hate mail eerily resembles criticism of the Black Lives Matter movement, by David Matthews (2015-08-18). Title says it all.

Plot bunny

Jul. 18th, 2016 12:57 pm
brainwane: several colorful scribbles in the vague shape of a jellyfish (jellyfish)
[personal profile] brainwane
The Ghostbusters crew gets called in to visit the main New York Public Library building (the Schwarzman Building, with the stone lion statues out front) ... because weird happenings are afoot at the new Hamilton exhibit.

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tim: Tim with short hair, smiling, wearing a black jacket over a white T-shirt (Default)
Tim Chevalier

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